Infamous, Reputed Crime Lord Indicted & Arrested

The reputed crime lord, Mr. Benny “The Shadow” Noodles escaped from jail a few days ago. He was awaiting his court date when its believed a couple of his henchmen snuck into the jail and sprung him loose without ever alerting anyone. The jails staff didn’t know he was even missing until it was time for all the prisoners to wake up.

It was a joint task force who ultimately was responsible for recapturing the escaped convict. Agents from the FBI, NSA, CIA, and ATF managed to track him down using a sophisticated camera system through the country. With two days they had him back in custody.

The court processes his paperwork ahead of time and wanted to get him sentenced and put away as quickly as they could, so his court date was bumped up. However the Shadow would vanish again! This time his henchmen tunneled their way into the jail and helped their boss escape through a sophisticated maze of tunnels. Police found gas cans and a broke down motorcycle when they entered the tunnel system that Benny used to escape. They think he made his way into the tunnel where a Kawasaki sport-bike was waiting for him. He started it up after filling it up with fuel and made his grand escape.

Unfortunately just like the first time the FBI tracked him down again using the same camera system, known as “The Eye”. Benny Noodles was recaptured and this time he was taken to court the very next day.

His court date was only yesterday, and as promised we said we would keep you updated on this story as we received info and updates. Our reporters stood outside of the court, waiting for the Teflon don to make his way out the double doors of the courthouse. After a few hours a man exited the building. It was Benny’s attorney. “We lost” the attorney said as he count help but stare down at the ground in shame and embarrassment.

There you have it ladies and gentlemen. Mr. Benny Noodles has been incarcerated for 25-50 years, without the possibility of parole. Instead of Roxbury Penitentiary the judge sent him upstate, far out in the Atlantic ocean on an island known as “Arkum”. This island is home to the most dangerous, ruthless, and psychotic criminals/convicts in the world. It gets no worst then Arkum.

The island is surrounded by concrete walls that are super thick. They have barbed wire spanning the entire wall, with watch towers every 100 feet. After the concrete walls there is approximately 100 yards of open ground that is riddled with landmines. After that is 50 yards of multiple fences. In the fences you have armed guards and dogs that patrol the perimeter of the complex. There is 4 fences with barbed wire that creates 2 complete tracks that surround the prison system. Dogs and guards patrolled these tracks day & night in a series of shifts.

There are more towers within the one track that surrounds the prison. These towers house snipers that are trained to be able to hit a nickle at 400 yards. Benny will be spending the majority of his days at the Arkum Asylum.

But it’s not likes it all that bad really. He has alot of buddies at the Penitentiary. The Shadows P.I.C. (Partner In Crime) The Joker has been locked up here for awhile and has the whole prison under his control. These two men have been making things happen on the outside from inside the prison somehow. The prison officials are bewildered and do not know how they are able to run things going on outside of the prison. They are working hard to try and answer that question. It’s just a rumor but our sources tell us that while they was visiting the Arkum Asylum that they was told The Joker runs the entire prison. His clique “The Asylum Regime” calls the shots on the inside and outside. Which means the orders flow down the totem pole so to speak. The Asylum gives its orders to the Black Hand, and then the hand gives the orders, or Info to the AMUE. This is just a rumor we remind you and hasn’t been confirmed. We are working to find out how true this statement is.

Until then AM, have fun and stay safe!