Hello America!
We have gotten several reports over the last few hours and last few days. We fear that America’s mob has taken a turn for the worse! Frankie-Calabrese, the second American Mafia Legend, was found knocked off his throne and found lying in a ditch. The crime scene was so gruesome family could barely identify the body. We knew that he would be having a closed casket funeral for sure. Although, we have received other reports of him still walking the streets seeking vengeance on The-King and Joe-Colombo.
We may never know what truly happened. Rumors also say that The-Dubliner, the Florida born and raised National Crime Syndicate Boss, was found dead in Wisconsin after several hours of shooting. One eyewitness accounts, “it was crazy I seen Dub unload a clip from his tommy gun and striking Bane several times.” This didn’t seem to faze Bane as he had reportedly returned fire only to strike The-Dubliner several times, nearly fatal shots.
The-Dubliner should have been dead but witnesses report seeing him grabbed up and shoved into a van as Bane drove away. America, we ask you to lock your doors and keep everyone away from the windows tonight.
Until next time, stay safe.
-Edward R. Murrow.